captivesofhope

Finding renewal and hope

Tag Archives: God


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Glorious Misery

In the Spirit, I saw a sheet descending from Heaven. When it reached me, it wrapped itself around me and pulled me up to His throne and set me in His arms. There, I was immersed in a pool of the purest love. It was poured on me like fresh water from a well. Jesus began to share His heart with me. The only words I can use to describe it are; sweet pain and glorious misery. I saw the faces of people who have turned away from God. I felt God’s grief over His lost friends. I felt Him yearning for them to come back. I felt such love, compassion, and mercy for them. My heart ached. It was astounding to feel such peace and grief at the same time. I was so deep into Him, I never wanted to leave. I wanted to stay and let Him love me like that forever, but I knew I had to come back because I want to help Jesus get His friends back. I don’t want to go to Heaven alone. I have to go take someone with me. I want the ones that nobody wants. I want the useless, the unloved, the lost, the broken, the dying, the rejected and abandoned. I want them. If that is you, please let me hear from you. I want you to go to Heaven with me.

Dear Jesus,

Lead me to the ones nobody wants. Let me be an overflow of Your compassion for the rejected souls. Help me not to shrink back as I go the hottest flames to get Your people. Make my life a beacon of hope so that anyone can find You if they so desire. Use my hands and my feet. Though my hands are rough, give them a gentle touch. Though my feet are tired, energize them with the gospel of peace.

Amen


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Driver Error

Driver error refers to the driver in the car making a mistake that leads to negative consequences. This was the diagnosis for my car that would not start on Friday. The fact that the car did not start allowed me to minster to a wonderful person about the goodness of God. My car stayed at McDonald’s overnight. When the mechanic looked at the car the next day, he stated that the problem was due to driver error. The car started right up when he switched the gears.  He said that I turned the car off without putting it fully in park. I could believe that, but the only problem is that the One who was driving does not make mistakes. Jesus had the wheel that day. I had been in earnest prayer all day. I even sat in another parking lot seeking God about this blog. I know that God was in control. The fact that my car started right up the next day tells me that God just wanted to use me. I am so privileged and overwhelmed that God would trust me to not panic in a situation like that. I was alone with my one year old in a place I had never been to before and the car would not start. I thank God for trusting me and allowing me to trust Him. So, I say that if you let Jesus drive, there is no such thing as driver error.


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Fragrance of Praise

When you lay at the feet of Jesus to pour yourself out, the fragrance from that worship lingers on you and on Jesus. When the woman poured her oil from the alabaster box onto Jesus’ feet and wiped His feet with her hair, she anointed Jesus, but she also anointed herself. Surely the scent of that moment remained in her hair and on her hands long after she arose to leave. Others probably smelled that expensive sacrifice on both her and on Jesus. Those people knew that she and Jesus smelled the same. Tufts of that sweet aroma floated on the breeze as her locks of dedication lifted with its blowing. The scent traveled and touched others even without her knowledge. They experienced the vestiges of a heart broken onto Jesus like the alabaster box. When we pour the ointment of sacrifice and praise upon Him, it causes us to draw others because we smell like Jesus. God then positions us to cross paths with precious souls that He wants to draw in.

Yesterday, I was sitting in a parking lot eating. Once I finished, I tried to start the car and nothing happened. I could have panicked, but I didn’t because my life is on the altar. I waited for a moment and a young lady came over and offered her assistance. She let me use her phone and she drove me home. On the way home, we both realized that God had set us up. I got to give my testimony to a lovely stranger. Perhaps God wanted her to smell my hair.


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Precious Pain

When I gave my life to God, everything fell apart. My marriage collapsed, I dropped out of school though I had a full scholarship, I had a nervous breakdown and depression tried to ruin my life. I can assure you that I was not having fun during this time, but what I was doing was growing. I was learning to trust God with everything. Some days I thought the pain would kill me, but God commanded even my lungs to breathe because I lacked the strength. I found a place in God where pain ceased to exist. At times, I almost thought the world was gone because I was so deep into Him. During worship times at church, I got so lost in His presence, so lost in fact that I had someone ask me, “where do you go during worship?” I didn’t know what it was called then. Now I refer to it as the secret place. The devil couldn’t find me there. Fear couldn’t find me there. Failure and depression couldn’t find me there. I was covered by the shadow of His wings.

And now, when God uses me, there is a foundation underneath me. I have fought and won in Jesus’ name. I have a platform of experience to speak from. God has repaired my marriage. As a matter of fact, as I stood at the altar weeping about God’s will for this blog, my husband came over, put his arms around me and began to wipe my tears away. It was so worth the struggle so that I can watch God dust off the diamond I married. I also have a Bachelor’s degree having graduated with a 4.0 average. I am months away from a Master’s degree also with a 4.0 average. My mind is stable (though some might debate this J). I found Him who has promised to be faithful.

Can I invite you to remember something God has promised you? Write it down so that when He does it, you will have a record. Also, write down the promises that God has already fulfilled. This is your proof of His faithfulness. It is not that we want to doubt, we just forget to believe. So remember Jesus today. Meditate on His words to you. Believe them. I am a witness to His ability to bring every word to pass. Hebrews 10: 35-38 declares, “For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised. For, Yet a little while, and the coming one will come and will not delay; but my righteous one shall live by faith…” (English Standard Version)


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Winter Spring

Today, it is 70 degrees outside. It is like a spring day in February. The  warmth is pushing its way into every crevice of my soul. I feel as if every time I inhale, I am breathing in bursts of joy. I feel Jesus. He created Spring to remind us of the hope that rests in Him. Wintertime is cruel and harsh. It sends birds away and puts animals to sleep. It makes us put on layers to protect ourselves from its ravishing cold. The seasons represent life. There are times when an ice storm attacks our hearts. It freezes our insides and makes us put on layers called walls. We protect ourselves from the cold or the hurt. But Jesus is warmth. When we let Him, the heat of His love reaches down and melts the cold and the hardness. He turns our ice into oil as it flows into a pool of worship and anointing. The bitterness that held us captive becomes a sea of love that touches those who are sleeping. It makes the birds fly to us again. Flowers bloom and grass grows tall. Others are reborn like morning glories.

Dear Jesus,

Melt the ice in my soul. Let it turn into praise and adoration. Warm me with Your love. Repair the bridges that I have dismantled with my own hands due to fear. Repair the separation caused by misunderstandings. Let my life be a testimony of Your ability to give life again and again. You save us from sin and you save us from ourselves. Work Your perfect will in me.

Amen